Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I just wanna go.



WARNING... Emotional.


I have been feeling so restless. I just want to get out of here, I feel like I'm in prison. Nothing that used to be fun is fun, no one is doing anything anymore. It feels like life has stooped people are fine living their boring meaningless life's day in and day out. Wake up, go to work, come home, sleep, repeat. I mean whats happening. it it just in my world that this is going on. I not My sister and Brothers are still living life doing things going to movies meeting friends beach party's, pool party's, Disneyland, Dinner, walks on the beach, bike rides, concerts road trips. I'm sitting on my couch everyday getting fat waiting for something to happen. I just don't know anymore. I don't know what to do here. This country is not my home its not where I'm happy and I may not have been happy all the time in California but at least I was doing something and going some place. Im in a stand still and I cant take it any more I need to Move I need to Live. Im sick of the same old boring weekends here all all anyone ever dose now is drink for NO REASON. No body wants to play games, no one wants to have theme party's WHERE PEOPLE ACTUALLY DRESS UP! Ya so you have to spend a little cash for something fun to wear but NOBODY wants to. Or maybe its just me or my friends, maybe I'm the only one is Sweden with boring friends. I don't know anymore, but I do know I'm gonna go kookoo for real soon. . People would rather just do the same old thing all the freaken time. I hate this I hate that Im not happy, I hate that I'm depressing, and My blog is depressing. This is not me. Im loosing myself. I know only I can fix this but I don't know how. I always have such hard diction to make because My heart it split between to countries. It will never be easy for me and Nobody will ever understand the stress My heart is under. I Just want OUT. :'(

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